Top 8 sex questions answered
By Dr Nor Ashikin Mokhtar
I'm not turned on when he is
This is something that a lot of women worry about, because it upsets the harmony of their relationship with their partners. Men who do not understand this will think that their wives or girlfriends are rejecting them, or do not desire them any more.
The truth is, desire goes up and down for each individual. You cannot expect your desire to be in sync with your partner's all the time.
Women experience "responsive desire", meaning that they respond to cues from the other person.
They need to be shown that they are desired and loved, in order for them to want sex.
This is in contrast to men, who experience an impulsive attraction to their partners, without requiring someone else to initiate anything.
Unfortunately, men will just have to work a little harder to show that they desire and love their partners, in order to get the same response back!
I need a little tenderness
Women need flowers and sweet words while men only need sexy visuals? This may be a bit of a stereotype, but it is partly true.
Tenderness, in the form of romantic gestures, loving words and a gentle touch, can be a powerful aphrodisiac for women.
It does not mean that the entire process of intercourse has to be accompanied by violins and roses, but women generally need a little wooing in the beginning until their sexual desire peaks.